We Watched A Porno
Tich and RPJ, a Canadian couple, watch and review adult films from the past in this comedy podcast. They dive into the acting, directing, script, and action of each film, offering humorous commentary. The show aims to entertain with laughs while exploring the world of vintage pornography.
Episodes
Stiff Competition
AVN Top 500Athletes are gearing up for the annual "Suck Off" championship, a competition dedicated to crowning the woman with the best "oral technique." Top coach, Jeff, loses his star contender, The Mouth, after she quits mid-round during an exhibition match. Desperate for a new would-be star ‘athlete’ to compete for the world title, he finds the perfect candidate in the form
Tapestry of Passion
Lust, Desire, Satisfaction and so much more all come together in... Tapestry of PassionPrivate detective Johnny Wadd is hot on the case of a mysterious and beautiful woman known as 'The Black Widow' whose lovers have an unfortunate habit of dying...Starring: Annette Haven, Desiree West, Joan Devlon, Leslie Bovee, Sharon Thorpe, Suzy Chung, Veronica Taylor, John Holmes, John LeslieCategories: '70
NEW PODCAST COMING NEXT WEEK
We are expanding.Sure we watch A LOT of porn. And sure we enjoying talking about it.But we also watch other things. Ever wonder what our thoughts are on other films or TV?We have an all new bi weekly podcast where we talk about all the other tings we have been watching. From Lord of the Rings to the 1970's Japanese cinema and everything in between.Follow us on INSTAGRAM THEME SONGFirst episode
Double Cross
She's An Automatic Weapon.Get ready for action with adult film's hottest blonde! Jill Kelly is a desperado on the run in this, the latest erotic action thriller from Brad Armstrong and Greg Steele. She electrifies the screen in a role that will have you on the edge of your seat, and at the point of no return. And just when you thought it was safe to go back into the bedroom...you're Double Crossed
Looker
This is the girl your mother warned you about...You should have listened.1999 AVN Award Winner for Best Film of The Year.AVN Top 500 - Vince Vouyer is a burnt out vice cop obsessed with a 40-year-old murder spree. The killings were committed, it is believed, by a prostitute dubbed the "femme fatale." Vince thinks he has a suspect - in photos of each of the crime scenes, he sees, or thinks he sees,
Night at the Erotic Museum
When down-on-his-luck loser (James Deen) lands a job as a night security guard in the world famous EroticHeritage Museum, he soon discovers the reports of strange events taking place after-hours are true! Reports are out that the exhibits come to life at night and have sex with the guests. James and superstar Riley Reid, who plays the museum tour guide, are soon front and center engaging with Gold
Blinded by Love
She Saw Her Way To Love. He Saw His Way To Change.An escaped criminal finds his way into the house of a blind girl. As their passion grows, she sees in him what the sighted had not. And both their worlds change. Forever.Starring: Leena, Debi Diamond, Crystal Wilder, Steven St. Croix, Mike Horner, Steve Drake, Terry Thomas, KristaWATCH HERE
Trailer
Mini trailer on some of the movies to come!
Penetrator 2
AVN Top 500 - The future of the free world is at stake and the penetrator must jump back in time to protect Melissa against an evil and advanced cyborg. Machine is pitted against machine as the cyborg from the future tracks his human prey in the present day, bent on impregnating her in order to alter the fate of mankind.Studio: Pleasure ProductionsSeries: PenetratorRun Time: 1 hrs. 21 mins.Release
The New Barbarians 2
A magic crystal, a strange wizard, and some ravishing amazons make for erotic adventure in the arousing conclusion of Henri Pachard's time-travel epic, The New Barbarians. Will the barbarians make it back to their time? Will Nina and Joey ever make it back to the present? Will anybody even notice with all the sex going on? Find out for yourself in The New Barbarians 2.Starring: Angela D'A
The New Barbarians RECAP
A Quick Recap of what happened in The New Barbarians before you listen to to the episode The New Barbarians 2.
A Formal Faucett
A FORMAL FAUCETT (67 min)When Formal Faucett Minor discovers her boyfriend Jimmy in bed with another woman, she decides it’s finally time to flee her small-town existence and venture into the big city and become the star she always dreamed she would be! With tongue firmly in cheek, Fred Lincoln’s bizarre comedy (and second directing effort).1979,1978 / 75 min, 67 min / 1.85:1, 1.37:1 / English Mon
The New Barbarians
A glowing crystal that causes sexual arousal, as well as time travel, is the centerpiece of this sexual sword-and-sorcery epic from award-winning director Henri Pachard. Gorgeous Victoria Paris stars as the buxom Amazon whose quest for the stolen crystal takes her from one sexual tryst to another, and eventually into another century! Don't miss the first half of the most important adult featur
The Whore of the Rings
In a fantasy land filled with magic and dragons a group of heroes led by Noname Jane and Aurora Snow must save the world from evil sorceress (Kylie Ireland). If the sorceress gains control of the last ring she will send central earth into complete darkness and despair. Whore of the Rings is all anal epic of sprawling proportions with a superstar cast! You're going to love the costumes, the sto
Naked Hollywood #3 Wired: Love in the electronic age
Wired: love in the electronic ageLove in the Electronic Age creates a whole new set of rules! In Episode 3, Kim meets her online lover and his wife! Annie and Monica feel the "vibe" at a sex toy party then go home to take matters into their own hands! And Lindsey's new lover is her #1 fan and the best lay she's ever had!Starring: Adajja, Bridgette Kerkove, Dee Baker, Keri Windso
Busted
Before her new neighbors move in, Raylene hires an escort (Voodoo) to help assuage her loneliness. She begins the encounter with a glass of , and then takes her Portuguese friend upstairs to her bedroom for a raucous romp. Raylene begins with some fine cock sucking and then Voodoo makes her writhe uncontrollably as he tongues her clit and nibbles on her labia. The two eventually move through a few
So I Married a Porn Star
Lights! Camera! Your Ass In My Face!Lights! Camera! Your ass in my face! Steve (Tony Tedeschi) & Felecia (Mercedez) were the perfect couple. Madly in love and happily married...that is, until Steve begins to suspect that his perfect bride is living a secret life as a porn star. But catching her in the act proves difficult as he is thrown into a hilarious adventure into the world of adult film
TABOO
When Barbara Scott's (Kay Parker) husband leaves her, blaming her frigidity for destroying their marriage, she's left alone, without a source of income, and charged with taking care of their teenage son, Paul (Mike Ranger). Feeling vulnerable, she turns to her friend Gina (Juliet Anderson) who opens Barbara's eyes to the secret world of suburban swingers. But as erotic tension grows, B
Let's Get Physical
Let's get physical! These fit dancer bodies show you just how they stay in shape. Prepare yourself for a steaming-hot, muscle-building, sex workout that will make you sweat. Watch these beautiful babes crunch, pump, push, and lift their bodies, giving new meaning to the word fitness. Erica Boyer, Hyapatia Lee, Martina and Shanna McCullough know that sex is still one of the best and most fun wa
Body Girls
Fitness instructor Jackie La Lay runs a highly popular and successful health club. Since the female club members are going to be competing in a bodybuilding contest against rival clubs, Jackie encourages her gals to engage in all kinds of strenuous carnal activities in order to get and stay in shape for said contest.Director: Bob ChinnWriters: Bud Lee, Hyapatia LeeStarring: Hyapatia Lee, Bud Lee,
Naked Hollywood 2: Lust or Love
IT'S ANOTHER BONUS EPISODELust or LoveLust or Love! Monica, Lindsey, Kim and Annie are modern women with modern problems! In Episode 2, Monica wonders if great sex makes up for a so-so suitor as Annie just hungers for hard-ons! Meanwhile, Lindsey's lover turns possessive while Kim's gets her off, and then gets going!Starring: Darla Crane, Dee Baker, Keri Windsor, Lauren Montgomery, Ni
Poison
Celeste Is Lethal.Woody Long is a man on the verge. Of Death.He's been secretly poisoned, and his last hope is detective Bill Marlowe.Was it foxy Celeste? Slinky Dyanna Lauren? Unknown Sally Layd? Or awesome new blonde Kylie Ireland? Do you care, as long as they're all nude at some point?Join Scotty Fox on a who-done-it of epic proportions, starring a girl of epic proportions. Celeste is P
Naked Hollywood #1: Faking it
Welcome to a new bonus series!Tich and RPJ are taking a tour into the world of Mini Series Porn... and each week they will be talking about an episode of the Naked Hollywood Series.Faking ItFaking it- it's just not orgasms anymore. Pretending to be what we want to be, not who we are. Lying to ourselves about what we really want and whom we want it with. It's all about living in Hollywood a
Priceless
Deja vu. Past lives. Real? Illusion? Jenna's about to find out. She's facing Murder One, but has the gnawing feeling that this has all happened before. Can she refute the charges and still lead an intriguing sex life? Undoubtedly. Priceless. The experience of a lifetime.Studio:Wicked PicturesDirector: Jim EnrightRun Time: 1 hrs. 38 mins.Release Year: 1995Starring: Holly Body, Jenna James
Bedlam
Maybe The Walls Don't Have Ears, But The Mattress Talks.
Maybe the walls don't have ears, but the mattress talks. Welcome to Director Paul Norman's "Bedlam", the story of a girl and her bed. A bed that gives advice, tells tales, and just might save Celeste from some untold danger. All in all, it's bedlam. When all hell breaks loose...and it feels just like heaven.
Starri
Without a Trace
YOU CAN RUN, AND YOU BETTER HIDE.
A missing father, a missing beauty queen. Or are they missing? Covert contacts, a private investigation, and it's all taking place in the shadows of the capitol where the seediest of exchanges go down and the sexiest of encounters are played out in the shadows.
Starring: Alex Foxe, Devinn Lane, Holly Hollywood, Kelsey Heart, Kristal Summers, Renee LaRue, Shel
Trouble Maker
Happy New Year!
We start off 2025 with an absolute banger of a film.
1995's Trouble Maker.
She's Trouble... But it Works On Paper.
Asia and Eric are newlyweds. On their honeymoon, they take on a partner of another sort.
Celeste...troublemaker.
The mind games are as hot as the sex play. Celeste, Tammi and Asia go at it with an anal bullet. Laura Palmer and Asia make love on a pool table. Celeste ta
Eve's Gift
The Story of A Miracle that DIDN'T Happen on 34th Street!
"Angels come in all sizes and shapes. They can even be a cocktail waitress in a deserted bar on Christmas Eve. They can save a man who feels like half a man. And best of all, they can even be Devon. Make a wish upon a star?"
Join Tich and RPJ this holiday season for a very very VERY depressing Christmas porno.
Sure the sex is good, but thi
Promises and Lies
A magical night that neither can forget leads Julianne and Matt to a fateful reunion 10 years after.
A lot has happened in each of their lives but they are determined to rekindle the flames of passion that blazed ever so briefly a decade past.
Can sexual lighting strike twice?
Directed by F.J. Lincoln
Run Time: 1:26 min
1997
-Watch Here -
Dear Diary
1995's Dear Dairy is a film you need to see to believe.
A film that won two AVN awards for acting, Tich and RPJ have a lot to say when it comes to the acting of this film. Hint ... it blows their minds!
For once a porno that has acting that acting isn't all that bad. And there's more! The sex is pretty good as well!
A busty blond in a wheelchair that has a magic diary that makes people have sex? Y
Cheeky!
The King of Erotic Cinema Tinto Brass directs a cult classic in Cheeky! This beautifully shot and killer soundtrack erotic cult film comes to 4K UHD for the first time, and we are here for it.
Tich and RPJ review the Uncensored Director's Cut, which is filled butt show after butt shot.
This is the most horny film to be reviewed yet!
Cheeky! 91 minutes/2000
Written/directed/edited by Tinto Brass
Erotic Adventures of Candy / Candy Goes to Hollywood
It's DOUBLE FEATURE TIME, with Gail Palmer's "Erotic Adventures of Candy" and "Candy Goes to Hollywood".
Carol Connors of "Deep Throat" fame stars as Candy, a ditzy blond that travels around America having sex.
Written and Directed by Gail Palmer these films on paper should avoid the trappings of toxic male fantasy ... and yet it's somehow worse ...
Strap in and get ready for bad acting, bad the
Haunted
What would you do if you discovered the house you live in was built on ancient whoring grounds?
Now, imagine it possessed by the spirits of horny tricks and whores. Would you stay? Haunted, a tale of things that go hump in the night!
Join Tich and RPJ as they dive into the spooky world of Haunted!
Directed by Jerome Tanner ( 2002 )
1 Hour 11 min
Playback
A guy named Al has a late night, wacky comedy show that's co hosting by guy in an ape costume. This show plays random amateur porn via VHS. Al has a sister who watches this show ... and plays with herself whilst watching this show. She has a boyfriend who is an out of work actor with no money. And he spends what money he does have on sex workers to bring home and film having sex with partner.
How
Night of the Spanish Fly
Ever wonder what might be the weirdest idea for a porno ever? Well, we think we found it.
New York. 1976. A shipment of Gogo Wieners ( hotdogs ) and the aphrodisiac "The Spanish Fly", have been cross contaminated!
That's right, a porno that has women eating hotdogs and having sex. A LOT OF HOTDOGS.
Is it sexy? No. No it is not. But its insane and fun to watch.
Night of the Spanish
Mini Update Episode #4
Catch up after the first episode of Season 2 hits your ears and find out whats next for you next week with the real trailer for the next film being reviewed ... The Night of the Spanish Fly.
The Night Bird
The Nite Bird is a disco sex club in the film ‘The Night Bird’ … you read that right.We are back with an all new season of We Watched a Porno.And things are weird!We try to take make sense of the 1977 adult film that’s says it’s about a guy who’s wanting to learn to dance.Side note, there is very little dancing.Listen as Tich and RPJ go to town on this terrible film that leaves you wondering, “why
Mini Update Episode #3
With days away until Season 2 hits your ears, heres another mini update to keep things hot and heavy.
We have a bunch of trailers from films that got reviewed in Season 1. From Amber Aroused to The Tale of Tiffany Lust.
Need to catch up on past episodes? Don't wait nay longer and get on that.
Plus a the trailer for the film that will be reviewed in Episode 1 of Season 2 ... The Night Bird!
Mini Update Episode #2
We are coming back with an all new season as of Sept 19th 2024, and we have some fun news for you in this Mini Update Episode.
What will the new season look like and some fun additions to past episodes!
We've done some digging and have found audio of trailers from Season 1 episodes and will be sharing them with you before Season 2 kicks off.
Listen now and Subscribe so you don't miss out o
Erotic Heat
Art. Paintings. Sex. Do they come alive? Do you enter the painting? Are the really photographs? What that statue? Erotic Heat that brings a plot so confusing that Inception looks like the ABC’s! What is Erotic Heat? Who knows. We for sure don’t.
Slip into Silk
A late night radio talk show host is about to lose her job to someone else. How will she ever keep her job? Trust us when we say it’s not how you think. In this episode we talk about the a film that had so much potential yet fails to excite on any level.
The Tale of Tiffany Lust
Poor Tiffany has the perfect life. Money, a loving husband, a New York home … but that’s not enough for Tiffany, she wants more. So she writes a letter and leaves it out for her husband to find, stating she’s off to sexually explore the world. Tich and RPJ got their hands on the 4K Melusine box set of 1981 cult classic adult film, The Tal
Star Trek: The Next Generation - A XXX Parody
We boldly go where no nerd has gone before … a woman’s bedroom! Jokes aside, this week Tich and RPJ talk about the 2011 adult parody film that asks the question, “ would you like to the Picard get a blow job?” How many sex scenes on a holodeck can there be? Is this based off a real episode? Who the hell are these characters? Should we have watched the TV show to get this porn?
Moondance
An ancient cult, as old as man, has gathered once again for one purpose only; to quench and unrelenting thirst for strange sex. Under the full moon, the deviant dance unfolds. The decadent orgy lacks only one thing … a willing human offering! Tich and RPJ dive into the weird world of MOONDANCE. A 2002 film that’s close to 2 hours with a plot that will lea
Corporate Assets
CONTENT WARNING: This episode talks about sexual harassment/assault and rape. Jill’s life has been reduced to nothing more than an on-call prostitute, charged with taking care of the other girls in the corporation’s illicit harem. But as her secret pen pal relationship with Winston, a mild mannered park ranger with a violent past, grows into some
Amber Aroused
By the mid 1980s, the era of theatrical hard-core features was winding down. With budget shrinking, directors committed to shooting on film often shows to focus on smaller sets or single location, films, while attempting to include as much star power as they could get. Amber Aroused Comes from the autumn days of the “golden age” of adult cinema. Terr
The Vixens of Kung-Fu
Tich and RPJ dive into the problematic world of Vixens of Kung-Fu and deconstruct this bonkers 1975 “film”. Who is Yin? In fact, who is Yang? Odd fighting whilst naked. White folks playing Asian characters. Vaginas that smoke. Content warning for this episode. There is chat about sexual assault and rape.
Summer Camp Girls
We sit down to discuss if this film is set in the 80s or 50s, is this the worst reform camp ever? And possibly the worst choice for food used in sex seen … EVER. This 80s adult comedy film is all over the place. Camp councillors always complaining about almost losing their job cause the girls are too sexy, and over the top Italian/mobster dads.
Starship Eros
This week Tich and RPJ take on the Sci-Fi low budged adult film, Starship Eros. They ponder why this 67 min, 1979 movie has a robot that’s human from the waist down only, yet still has human hands. Why does the first third of the film take place in some dudes backyard in a gazebo? Open palm blow jobs, bad miniature models, and the choice to have not one, but four sex scenes in a chair! Plus an ent
Women at Play
This week we review the 1984 New York film about women in theatre, ‘Women at Play’. Stage director Wallis Greene is putting together a new erotic play. The various young ladies who are cast in said play decide to take a method approach to their parts by engaging in all sorts of carnal activities for real in the name of "research."
Mini Update Episode
This mini episode contains info on liking and subscribing, update on future episodes, and the theme song to the film Fast Cars Fast Women from episode 1!
Fast Cars Fast Women
Tich and Rod sit down for the first ever episode of We Watched A Porno to talk about the fast action 1981 adult film, Fast Cars Fast Women. Carolyn Jackson and Kay Parker star in this female car racing film that’s filled with terrible fight scenes, a music video in the middle of the film, dirty car sex, showers that are clearly to big for a trailer, and blow jobs to cops! We found our DVD copy of
